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Nadal chimes in on Federer-Djokovic rivalry, while under the ‘influence’.

Posted by tennisplanet on September 17, 2007

Hi,

This is Nadal, no?

I have been wanting to be No. 1 ever since I turned 18 (hey, that’s not good enough. Turn it up). Oh, Ok, since I was 17.

I had good chance this year, no?, but after the lasers, I gave up. But now with this new rivalry between Federer and Djokovic, I have hope again. Now, if someone could give me some brains, I will be perfect, no?

My aunt Tony and I have bribed ATP officials, so they can have both these clowns on one side of the draw. Auntie has even offered to sleep with the ATP officials. No response yet, no? But surprisingly, she is getting lot of calls from San Francisco. But that another direction, no?

Now, I think, once I have the face transplant to remove the dumb look on my face, everything will start clicking for me. These two clowns will start fighting from now on, and when I meet them in finals, they will be too tired, and I will just use my finger, sorry, racket to beat them in the finals, no?

Then I will be No. 1, no? The steroids I am taking these days is making my finger swell, causing blisters, since the opening is not getting any bigger with age and steroids. I need vaseline, no?

ATP people wanted my ass too, but when I told them, what all has already been up there, they opted for a chicken instead.

So this is good for me, no? These two lunatics fighting and I winning. So good, no?

And I told Mirka about Wawrinka and she said ‘don’t tell anyone else’. I was shocked, no? And you know Robert De Niro is Djokovic’s father. Don’t you see the semblance? Are you blind, no? Just look at that fat guy next to his mother in the stands, and then look at De Niro. How can you not see that?

So it is good they are fighting both on and off the court, no? So now my chance to kill or is it make the kill, no?

Oh, oh, oh, somebody know how to remove two fingers stuck ‘somewhere’, quick, please, no?

I more thing, do you wear clothes when at home. Just asking, no?

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