World’s Scariest Bridges.

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Remember Mirka tapping her lips with fingers after Federer’s loss to Djokovic – even when she was fully aware she was on the jumbo screen?

Sure you do!!!!!!!! Ever wonder what was going through her mind then?

The best way to decipher what someone’s body language is attempting to project is to ‘model’ it as closely as possible. There’s a whole science behind it. Don’t believe it? Try Federer’s shoulder tug, Nadal’s pick, Roddick’s slide, Delpo’s strip tease OR try it with something closer to you like your spouse, friend, sibling, boss, neighbor etc. – and be startled.

So what was she thinking?

-Here comes the next crying session. Can I freaking hire someone for it, now that it’s becoming a routine?

-These lips are going there again – for a few days – to appease someone.

-That Nadal blow up doll is about to take some serious beating – again. Time for a Djokovic one?

-I think the time I spend blowing up those dolls is having an inverse effect. After all, I don’t eat that much.

-I need to take him out of his misery now with the second set of poked condoms.

-Hope Annacone is watching me do this.

Pete Sampras Knows All Too Well What Roger Federer is Going Through. From Claire. Thanks.

CLAIRE

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Letter to Brooklyn Decker.

Dear Double Decker,

When you marry there’s this undeniable rush – fairly or unfairly – to determine if the union has been a match based on how things begin to unfold after the ceremony for either party – professionally, socially, monetarily, healthwise etc. etc. Unless you get Roddick to now dispel the near inevitable One-Slam wonder myth, you will NOT be considered an addition Roddick unnecessarily delayed hooking up to.

And what would be the best source to get pointers from for achieving above? Heard of someone called Bridgette? Both of have you have about the same background and about the same tennis player as husband less some 13 Slams. Bridgette was unanimously declared as the reason for Sampras’s flourishing career coming to a grinding halt for two freaking years. She knew how hard it would be for her to live with it for the rest of her life specially when the man she destroyed will be under the same roof – most of the time.

So she devised a plan, gained her man’s COMPLETE confidence nurtured with selfless love and affection and tactfully demanded that he climb the mountain peak one more time – this time with a slight twist – FOR HER SAKE. See the not so subtle difference? No, you don’t!!!!!

You see, we men are literally and figuratively nothing without the driving urge to impress women – from the dawn of civilization to now. But the ‘message’ HAS to come from the ‘right’ source. They don’t call ‘Woman can make or break a man’ for nothing. Are you the ‘right’ source? Prove it if you are. Or move freaking over for the right one to deal with it.

What’s in it for you? How about a man iron cladly guaranteed to be with you for the rest of your life – unless you decide to move on – on your own? Will that work for you? If you can get Roddick to unlock that placard around his neck it will most certainly be your most important achievement in your life. Considering it will come from you getting someone else to get something – it will be priceless. Not sure? Just ask Bridgette. She has Sampras around her finger and more 24-7. I think even Mirka failed to pull him away at one of the recent exhos. Need more proof? Watch Sampras’s ‘Hall of Fame’ speech for live verification.

Bottom line: Sit freaking down with Bridgette – in private. Get the formula, put your soul into it – body is fine too – and watch the miracle happen. You will never regret the effort – even if it falls short. The gains are infinite and immutable. Go for it NOW or LEAVE.

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